HOW DO YOU COPE WHEN YOU LOSE YOUR BEST FRIEND?

GIRLFRIENDS ARE THE BEST FRIENDS EVER, UNTIL THEY’RE NOT!

Relationships can be tricky to maintain and I’m not talking about romantic relationships here, I’m talking about relationships with our girlfriends. Those very special people in our lives who are always there to listen to us prattle on about a new boyfriend, help us decide what to wear on a date, a shoulder to cry on when we have a fight with a husband or boyfriend, jump in without question at a minutes notice to help us out, talk on the phone for hours about ‘everything,’ share the bottle of wine and take our phones of us when we break up with a boyfriend to avoid making a complete idiot of ourselves, in other words they are there for us no matter what!

Hangovers after a friend break-up: eating the whole post-drinking pizza by yourself and holding your own hair back while you’re sick

They are our confidants, our soul sisters, our very best friends! They are also the ones who will tell us some harsh truths about ourselves when that is what we need to hear. That is really what a true friend is!

But what do we do when we fall out with a girlfriend, when this very special relationship comes to an end.

There can be hundreds of different reasons why a friendship comes to an end, from changes in our own values and beliefs, violation of our trust, or the fact that the relationship has simply run it’s natural course.

Welcome to the brutal reality of friendship breakups.

Women can be real bitches, I think that little trait is in most of us and when we are hurt we really want to hurt back. How do we cope with the loss, with the empty hollow feeling inside us when all we want to do is pick up the phone and talk like we used to.

As humans we are constantly evolving, growing and changing, people come and go throughout our lives and the friends that remain close right to the end are very few by comparison.

Coping with this loss is no different to coping with any loss and to put it simply.

Tears and time!

  • It is incredibly painful to break up with a bestie, it’s much harder to explain the loss you feel and how hurt you feel
  • Give yourself time to grieve, the heart and soul need time to heal
  • Avoid checking up on what they are doing and who they are hanging out with, it only adds to the pain and will keep you stuck
  • Keep a journal, writing can be therapy in it’s own way
  • If the breakup was because of something that you contributed to, send a card and apologise
  • Accept the fact that things will never be the same as they were
  • Stalking on social media or interrogating your friends will prolong the healing, stop you moving forward and more than likely annoy your friends

Rebounding after a friend break-up: drinking the whole bottle of shit wine you used to share and watching your favourite Sex and The City episodes all alone.

Where to from here?

  • Get out and about and make the effort to meet new people.
  • Think about some new interests you might like to explore
  • Go to dance classes, art classes or other creative activity
  • Exercise! It’s a natural way to heal and have you feeling alive

Tears and time!

To share your comments or personal story – send me an email: jenny@divorcedwomensclub.com.au

With love and gratitude

Jenny xx

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